GOING TO HILLSONGS CONCERT LATER !!!!! i'm super looking forward to it !! praise and worshiping !!
there's alot of things tt realli troubled me recently . hope after going, i'll recieve God's healing and feel better?? having to strength to walk on . i broke down into tears a few times recently. it's realli horrible . i nvr felt so small and idiot before.
everything/people is changing i supoose?? negative, negative, still negative . maybe there's positives ones, but those negatives have already covered up them le . i dun hav the heart to play on, it's not a ''place'' i want to be, the feeling is diff le . maybe i'm over sensitive?? but i dun think so . i believe wad i felt and see . ppl do change due to the changes in their environment .
it's just not the kind bball i wanted it to be, not that kind i'm playing .
YTD, bbq at erin/moni's hse!!! it's gonna be the night i won't forget . gonna miss it so much lah . although not everyone is there . but it's a realli gd bonding time and a gd farewell party for moni . she's leaving soon, VERI SOON . hais . i really love her lah . why??!?? things realli aren't going my way .
MONI !!! i realli love and tresured the times spent with u!!!! I LOVE U !!
ppl says jc classmates won't be the best for ur sch-ing life . cos all only bothers about one's progress and achievements . but i dun think so, cos my class is fun, realli FUN . it can't said to be my best class i ever hav, but is one of the bestest class i ever had . now, must study hard, cannot retain .
17 May 2008 11:18 PM
these few days seem so weird . moni withdraw from sch on tues le . so from tue onwards she won't be with us for lessons anymore . it's so bu zi zai . i miss her la . she came back on wed from training !! and all of us took a team photos and few snap shots . i think tt will be the one and only whole team photo .
it only untill the past few days den i realise, my schedule is so packed lah . the last wk b4 moni leave, i won't hav time for her . wth la !! argh . now i must arrange and plan properly cos i realli wan to find time for her before she leaves . she will be my ever best friend, we shares many opinions, talks, many many !! gonna miss her so much so much . hais . and ''wow''!!, i found out i gt alot of stuff de dates clashes lah . i going to hav leadership training camp and con camp during the first 2 weeks, and at the same time youth cup, although i'm not a big role or important player, but it's not nice to miss too many matches . at the same time, i need to find 2 days out of per week to go gym with my sch team . mid-yrs coming straight after june holidays . argh !!!
i'm the newly elected captain for my sch team . nothting to be veri proud or ashame of . but i realli hope i can lead this team well . i dun wan tt pathetic history to repeat itself again . it's bullshit . it's my first time leading, so i realli do hope i can do my part well . peeps pls try to understand any misunderstandings, cos it's my first time leading . a bit pressured cos there's isn't much time left, but there's alot to learn .
somehw or rather, i began to like tis team, i see passion, i see their shang jing xin, although not all, but it's increasing . it's veri heart warming cos atleast they are trying . there's tis willingness . i felt a sense of team belonging, although we might be the losuiest team, so wad . i know many ppl out there look down on us, so wad . other ppl is putting in effort, so do we . we are trying too .
there's hav been a veri mixture feeling in me which realli bothers me, i started to prefer my sch team rather than outside one . they might be a stronger team but it's so diff that it's not a team i wanted to be in . in sch, u see hw ur teamates is trying to strive, it realli motivate u to strive and give ur best . but out there, i feel so so small . ppl changes, the feeling changes . we might have the same intention to play together as a team, we might feel the same when we get together, but the feeling playing as a team seem to changed, diff or not there anymore . i hate this feeling .
05 May 2008 10:31 PM
ytd night... heard something idiotic and freaking . learn something truely, nvr judge the book by its cover . i won't trust her anymore . seriously gonna hate her but cannot show out . and i believe in retributions de . hahas !!
ytd church feast day was tiring !! hahas . but fun too . although there is some arguements and unhappiness sumwhere, somehw.... but a veri nice and new experience as a cheese opener ?? hahas !! okie... we sell burgers, fries and bubbles teas . hahas . and this feast day thingy indeed drain energy.... i and moni today like zombies in sch . i kept stone-ing during lessons lah . hahas .
jy gt in combine team . oh my tians . hahas . short of one more ppl le . still senters lah . sians . hahas . it's a bit tough on me sia . cos training under coach michael alot of stress . veri scary . plus in sch i training for a forward le . at the outside team i playing center . hahas !! weird sia . but seriously, both teams gt pros and cons ?? outside de is a strong team comparing against my standard, a lot of good and better players, and wad we train now is more on personal skilss . all so li hai, so i felt quite small inside ?? hahas . but sch de leh, although not strong, and now we training basic, but the atmosphere there weird weird de . not bonded de . no team de gan jue . super weird .
somehw or rather, i felt pressured playing in both team . it's not the way like hw dunearn team is like . is rather veri diff . or veri diff . hais . wo xiang zhao hui yi qian de gan jue . it's so nice, loving and memorable lah ! hais . things changes so does ppl . i dun like the way it is now . ="(
03 May 2008 12:44 AM
i saw my eye candy alot of time and veri long today !! gonna love friday !! hahas . he waved and smiled at me . for that instance, my heart melted . stunned!!! hahas . he's so cute and handsome lah . hahas . shall not go into details . just tt i can say i saw him everywhere after sch, even during training . damn shoik de lah . hahas .
had training today . ran 2 km... den continued with the basic stuff . i can said, i didn't concentrate fully for today's training . there's a big distraction in front of me and alicia lah . hahas . can't focus . felt quite bad after tt .
talk to jl alot about my thoughts and also about this team . hmm... he has somehw cleared my thoughts, doubts and questions in mind . thanks alot !! somehw i felt pressured and worried . i tink onli moni knows wad's the reason . hahas . no matter wad, i won't give up liao le . 10 mths onli... veri short period of time . hahas . '' thrash it all out'' jl said de . hahas . moni must help me pray k ?? i need a lot of strength and courage . hahas !!!